Commit This to Memory

Even summer comes to an end

My third year of uni starts tomorrow. I'm feeling extremely lazy, and that is all.

I'll miss the summer holidays though. Gone are the days of bumming around 24/7. It doesn't really help that one of my best friends in melbourne has left for good. Her departure came so suddenly that sometimes it still feels a little unreal. But facts are facts, and she has left. With all the other students/people returning to melbourne, the small little group of friends I spent all my time with the past few weeks has now also expanded into an overwhelmingly large group. It's nice, I suppose, but sometimes I think back fondly on the not-too-long ago days when there were just three, or four of us, hanging out and I really do miss it. Guess I just really miss hanging out with wh, I spent just about every single day/hour with her the last couple of weeks. It was so easy and I really was very happy. Now there's no one I can send random messages to and go for lunch/dinner/supper/breakfast with and just talk all day with. Oh well. People say we'll meet in singapore etc, but do they get that it just wouldn't be the same again? I guess it's just how sudden her departure was...and another strange idea just creeped into the back of my head - I actually would miss talking to Aaron as well.

These days, I know how I'm fast approaching crossroads in my life once again, and it really scares me inside because it's hard for me to make a decision, it's hard cos I don't know where I should go, it's difficult because I don't know where God wants me to go. So yeah, I'm just scared inside now, and I know that the day of reckoning would come so quickly I might not even know what's gonna hit me till it's too late.

Have I ever mentioned how I hate the phrase "too late"...or, "it's too late".

love, 22:57
0 comments

Cold and frosty morning; there's not a lot to say

One week to go, one week has passed. Guess I'm at the half-way mark. I need more time.

Sometimes I think to myself, and this could be the last year, the first semester would be over in a flash, winter would come and go, the second semester would be over in a mere blink of an eye, and that's it.

Then again, what if I don't make it? What if?

Wanhui's leaving in less than a week's time; I want to go home but I will miss this place.

love, 12:17
0 comments

Eight Days a Week

The past few days have been nothing but stress. I don't know where it's coming from, all I know is that I'm not absorbing new information as quickly as I would have in the past, and that it really sucks to be spending 4 hours a day in french class, and to have to spend practically the whole night catching up on the day's work as well.

I'm burning out; people tell me it's just one day to go, but no one except myself knows that I'm going crazy. It's not entirely the french, I'm just tired. Of having to live this way. Sometimes I wonder why I have to make such difficult decisions that involve such huge changes and sacrifices...why can't I just have it the easy way for just this once. Yet I know there isn't a simple way out.

It's only February, I don't know if this makes me glad or impatient. It all boils down to three words - I don't know.

love, 22:31
0 comments

Drifting away,

I really don't like people who think they know everything.

And people who are mean (not just in a joking manner).

And I'm really am getting sick of mean jokes which aren't really jokes at all.

Can't people just be nicer, say more encouraging things, doubt less and love more? Wish you were here.

love, 18:19
0 comments